[00:04.31] The girl in the pastry shop with the net in her hair [00:07.27] Is making a cannoli for you to take on your hiking trip in the woods [00:11.63] With your bros that you've known since second grade and you [00:14.68] May encounter dragons and ruffians and be [00:17.01] Called upon to employ your testosterone [00:19.74] In a battle for supremacy and access to females glued to the TV [00:24.72] And even if you are victorious [00:26.81] You may receive many cuts and bruises and scrapes and you will [00:29.86] Require band-aids and antiseptic ointments [00:32.06] And tender love and kisses on your stab wounds [00:34.45] And when you come home she will be there waiting [00:37.51] For you with a fire in her eyes [00:39.47] And a big fat cannoli to shove in your mouth [00:42.02] And that's why you [00:43.89] Thank God for girls [00:48.23] Holla Jesu Christe [00:51.12] From Tennessee to LA [00:53.47] Thank God for girls [00:58.79] On your reckoning day [01:01.30] You better bow down and pray [01:04.41] She's so big, she's so strong [01:09.52] She's so energetic in her sweaty overalls [01:14.62] Thank God for girls (Thank God for girls) [01:19.70] Thank God for girls (Thank God for girls) [01:21.80] Thank God for girls [01:25.06] I'm so glad I got a girl to think of [01:28.06] Even though she isn't mine [01:30.64] I think about her all the day and all the night, it's a [01:33.11] 'Nuff to know that she's a-live, she says I [01:35.87] Give her sweaty palms, she almost had a heart attack [01:38.01] The truth is that I'm just as scared, I don't know how to act [01:40.52] I wish that I could get to know her better, but [01:42.54] Meeting up in real life would cause illusion to shatter, oh I [01:45.64] I carved her name into all the trees [01:48.21] I sang a song down on one knee [01:50.95] Looking at the underwear page in the Sears catalog like when I was 14 [01:55.58] I'm levitating like a magnet turned the wrong way around [02:00.53] I'm like an Indian fakir tryin' to meditate [02:02.26] On a bed of nails with my pants pulled down [02:04.95] Thank God for girls [02:09.99] Holla Jesu Christe [02:12.42] From Tennessee to LA [02:15.36] Thank God for girls [02:20.47] On your reckoning day [02:22.95] You better bow down and pray [02:25.26] She's so big, she's so strong [02:30.30] She's so energetic in her sweaty overalls [02:35.48] Thank God for girls (Thank God for girls) [02:40.63] Thank God for girls (Thank God for girls) [02:42.80] Thank God for girls [02:45.87] God took a rib from Adam [02:48.55] Ground it up in a centrifuge machine [02:51.62] Mixed it with cardamom and cloves [02:53.70] Microwaved it on the "Popcorn" setting while Adam was like (woo hoo) "that really hurts" [02:59.75] Goin' off into the tundra, so pissed at God [03:03.61] And he started lightin' mighty forest fires stealin' osprey eggs [03:06.97] Messing with the bees who would try to pollinate the echinacea [03:10.11] Until God said "I'm a smite you with loneliness and break your heart in two" [03:16.56] And Adam wept and wailed, tearing out his hair [03:21.28] Falling on his knees, looked to the sky and said [03:26.19] "Thank God" [03:28.87]